Mom is En Vacances

 I took the kids to the Memorial Art Gallery this week.

Owen was disappointed, because he thought it would be mostly suits of armor and swords and it turned out that it was just a bunch of pictures and stuff. That's boring.

James was disappointed because the other two ran out of gas before he could find all of the portraits in his scavenger hunt.

Felix thought that the mummy was scary. Everyone thought that tribal bird mask in the Folk Art collection was scary. 

Felix inherited his mother's response to art galleries. Interest and curiosity for ten minutes and then a sudden overwhelming need to lie down in a public place. (Felix's mother usually suppresses this reaction in herself until she gets back to her own vehicle. Felix, not so much)

"What's the number rule of being in the art gallery?" James: "DON'T. TOUCH. THE PAINTINGS." (Felix did not learn the number one rule.)

Owen has started prefacing things with sentences like: "I don't mean to hurt your feelings, but..." or "I'm not trying to be mean to you, but..." And then, no matter how many times you attempt him to stop whatever he is about to say from coming out (once he starts one of these sentences, he must complete it, even if you are actively carrying him away from his victim) he goes on to say something like "I noticed that your bathtub is a really weird shape." "I remember that the last time we visited your house you had popsicles and I'm wondering if you have any more of them." "I noticed that you have a seashell collection and I really like seashells and I think you should give me some." "I went into the bathroom after you were in there and it smelled really bad." "I think that you aren't very good at cooking hamburgers and I could cook them better than you."

The good news is that he can tell that he's about to say something rude. The bad news is that he apparently has no compulsion about saying it anyway.

More questions from Owen:

"Do worms have eyes?"

"Do bacteria have eyes?"

"How do worms know which direction they are going?"

"I don't want you to die because you are old. Is there a way that if I died, you wouldn't have to die?" 

Overheard James to Owen: "Leave that cocoon to its own business."

Felix has been struggling. Four was hard for each of the kids, and so far Felix is taking it all out with his fists. He's suddenly punching us when he gets angry. He clearly isn't putting his heart into it, just trying to provoke a reaction out of whoever is forcing him to do something against his will. (Usually making him sit on the potty.) So you can tell him that this isn't a very good way to express the feelings that he's feeling, and that it would be better if--WHUMP!

Also, he's learned how to kick you in the balls. Hard.