Owen and Felix's Plan

Owen and Felix have hatched a plan. They are going to wait until James and J and I are all out of the house, and then they are going to slam the doors shut and lock us out.

The first thing they are going to do is to eat all of the ice cream in the freezer.

They are also planning on taking all of James' toys and moving into our bedroom. (They will take turns sharing the grown-up bed.)

They are waiting to put the plan in motion until Owen is a little better at reading. (He's concerned about being able to read the recipes in the kitchen.)

He tells me not to worry. Every once in a while he will throw some food out the window for us.

They will take a lot of things that belong to us. "But probably we'll let you camp outside just for where you're sleeping."

And probably a blanket and some pillows.

Owen and Felix call it their "deal." They are still planning on taking baths every day. But sometimes they won't change their clothes.

For money they will take James' wallet and get the money from there. They will eventually start paying for more money once they are grown-ups.

They will probably clean up for a chore when the house gets messy.

They will eat apples for lunch.

They will stay up late and watch TV. They will watch movies like the ones that they like that are NOT Return of the Jedi. (The Emperor is too scary.)

Owen says that he will put underwear on Felix so he doesn't have to do diapers. If he poops in them, he'll wash them out with water. Maybe some soap if it's extra stinky.

They will skip school every day and throw Owen's schoolbooks outside except for the one that has animal pictures. They'll cut out all the pictures that they like with scissors.

They will get the dump trucks back out from the basement. And also wrapping paper (just to play with) and the dead bird skeleton. They will pick it up in a bag and discover the bird bones. And they will play hockey in the living room.

They will steal our phones and send funny emojis to Ivy Hamway.

There will be so much dessert. They will buy so much that they can never run out.

They will cut the high-chair in half and Felix will never have to sit in it again.

Owen will teach Felix how to drive the car.

They will touch lamps and no one will yell at them. Also, they will take down the wall art and play with it.

When they get tired they will play with stuffed animals and howl out the window.

They will do a lot of things that they can't do now.