The whiteboard in the adult lounge is supposed to be for my choir.
Back when I started as the choir director, I would write the rehearsal order up on the white board. I would also note any hymn numbers that we needed to go over and any changes to the upcoming schedule.
Then I started bringing a little bundle in a carseat with me on Sunday mornings, and eventually the bundle was up and crawling around between the altos and sopranos (all of whom were convinced that James regarded them as an auxilary grandparent), and then he was up and walking and conducting along with me.
James was the most restrained with the whiteboard. As an artist he only had two major phases--carwashes and hockey rinks. For the first few years of his drawing career he would only draw the Royal Carwash that we lived next to on Clover Street. First the attendants shouting neutral, then the spish-spish, then the wipe-wipe, then the wee-ooh, wee-ooh, then the rinse, then the bubbles, then the rinse. Simple.
James was also the most responsible about putting caps back on markers when he was done, although I still regularly found dry erase markers almost entirely dried out a week after he'd hidden them behind the piano. Owen, I think, leaves them out to ruin on purpose.
The hockey phase was slightly more interesting. He would change up the teams that were playing, but the basic features of the arena were always the same.
Owen has been a free spirit, artistically, from the beginning. He began by drawing on himself and his Sunday clothes, and then to copying James' hockey arenas. He progressed next to repeated letter Os, and then to his whole name, and then to whatever James had been talking about/obsessing over for that week.
Felix joined in at the earliest age, probably because both of his older brothers were coloring the white board as soon as they'd finished their morning laps. (As soon as we arrive at church every Sunday they tear around the empty building at full speed for about 10 minutes.) Felix could barely reach the bottom edge of the white board when he first started drawing, and more than once I had to remove a marker to keep him from sucking on it. He mostly, according to Owen, draws grass.
It's become an expectation now for my choir to survey their weekly artwork before they look at the rehearsal instructions. I think, for them, it's a little bit like seeing what the Google doodle of the day is going to be. Owen announced his masterpiece from atop a chair this week and pointed to show the finer details.
"It's Darth Vader getting kicked in the penis. It's funny, because he's being kicked in his penis."
In other artwork news, Felix made a Jackson Pollock painting on our living room this evening using nothing but his stomach acid, a recently consumed bottle of milk, and some sort of flu strain. We acknowledged out loud when we bought our lovely and expensive new couch that one of the kids would eventually throw up on it. I think we were both surprised when it wasn't Owen. Felix is now putting a towel on his head and sitting on a quarantine blanket in the library. His George is in the dryer for the third night running. (Mud and water incidents, unrelated)
Sunday, June 30, 2019
Thursday, June 27, 2019
Highlights from the Last Two Weeks
-Visiting Smith grandparents on a perfect day and watching the great-grands push toys around in their driveway. ("Burn rubber, boys!")
-Watching the pike swimming in Johnson Creek and throwing acorns off the dock at the frogs to try to make them hop
-A spectacular called shot by J. After having looked for the Michelle Obama biography during every library visit for the last three months in vain, she looked at me on the way into the Fairport library and said casually (but confidently) "It's going to be here. Today's the day I get it." And so it came to pass
-Eating at the Hojack shack in Lyndonville with Grandma and Grandpa Smith. Poutine, hot dogs and hamburgers, and then huge ice cream sundaes while the kids bounced around the playground and made friends with the other summer vacationing little ones.
-Trail running twice with Oliver in the early mornings before he had to head in to work
-Sorting out all the old clothes in the basement and finding homes for random pairs of boots, mittens, and onesies that have a proper bin but have sat out on their own for several months to several years
-Getting a beer with Sam and Korina at O'Lacy's and trying to convince the boys that chicken ramakis aren't spicy
-Submitting James' final 2nd grade paperwork to the school district and getting clearance to proceed with 3rd grade in the fall
-The best meal I've ever eaten. FLX table in Geneva, followed by walking around Geneva with Lucas and Melissa
-Discovering Amazing Grains salt bread at FLX table and then getting another loaf of it the next day from the bakery. Hot, chewy, pastry-flaky. I didn't know bread could be that good.
-Waiting for the mail to come with J's new pots and pans. (A gift card from a student plus birthday money)
-Netsin's on J's birthday with the kids, our first trip of the season
-Hiking up to the BMX jumps at the southern end of Tryon Park with the kids
-J's new birthday dress
-Grabbing brunch with a colleague who's moving to Cincinnati at the Parkside Diner up near Seabreeze
-Hiking to "Smith Island" in Tryon Park with the kids and throwing rocks in the stream with the kids for an afternoon
-Three visits up to Eastman Durand Park to sip wine or coffee (depending on the time of day) while the kids splashed in the lake and got sandy
-Watching the pike swimming in Johnson Creek and throwing acorns off the dock at the frogs to try to make them hop
-A spectacular called shot by J. After having looked for the Michelle Obama biography during every library visit for the last three months in vain, she looked at me on the way into the Fairport library and said casually (but confidently) "It's going to be here. Today's the day I get it." And so it came to pass
-Eating at the Hojack shack in Lyndonville with Grandma and Grandpa Smith. Poutine, hot dogs and hamburgers, and then huge ice cream sundaes while the kids bounced around the playground and made friends with the other summer vacationing little ones.
-Trail running twice with Oliver in the early mornings before he had to head in to work
-Sorting out all the old clothes in the basement and finding homes for random pairs of boots, mittens, and onesies that have a proper bin but have sat out on their own for several months to several years
-Getting a beer with Sam and Korina at O'Lacy's and trying to convince the boys that chicken ramakis aren't spicy
-Submitting James' final 2nd grade paperwork to the school district and getting clearance to proceed with 3rd grade in the fall
-The best meal I've ever eaten. FLX table in Geneva, followed by walking around Geneva with Lucas and Melissa
-Discovering Amazing Grains salt bread at FLX table and then getting another loaf of it the next day from the bakery. Hot, chewy, pastry-flaky. I didn't know bread could be that good.
-Waiting for the mail to come with J's new pots and pans. (A gift card from a student plus birthday money)
-Netsin's on J's birthday with the kids, our first trip of the season
-Hiking up to the BMX jumps at the southern end of Tryon Park with the kids
-J's new birthday dress
-Grabbing brunch with a colleague who's moving to Cincinnati at the Parkside Diner up near Seabreeze
-Hiking to "Smith Island" in Tryon Park with the kids and throwing rocks in the stream with the kids for an afternoon
-Three visits up to Eastman Durand Park to sip wine or coffee (depending on the time of day) while the kids splashed in the lake and got sandy
Friday, June 21, 2019
Owen's Day in Fairport
We wanted to have an adventure this morning, but not a muddy one. That ruled out a hike in the woods. And not a sandy one, which ruled out the lake. But a walk along the canal sounded delightful to everyone, so we drove to Fairport and set out on a walk.
I.
Owen had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. It started before we even left. We went to wash his hands in the bathroom and slipped on the stool. He got so mad that he screamed and started hitting the bathroom door.
Then he didn't want to hold hands crossing the street or walking in the parking lot, because James didn't have to hold hands. We wouldn't let him pester the man who was fishing by the canal either, and we wouldn't even let him try to fish or to give the man fishing advice when he found out that he hadn't caught any fish yet.
We didn't let him dance or run by the edge of the canal, either. He didn't even fall in. He was just close. But he didn't go in. We wouldn't let him on any of the boats that were tied up by the canal, even though no one was in them. Then we kept on pointing out interesting things for him to look at, but yelled at him when he was in the way of bicyclists and runners and not listening to us because he was looking at interesting things.
Also, Owen was very thirsty. And tired of walking. And Felix got to ride in the stroller because he was a baby, but Owen had to keep walking. And he couldn't share Mommy's water bottle because he had been sick recently, and that wasn't fair either.
And he didn't even step in dog poop. He just almost stepped in dog poop. But he didn't actually step in it.
When we got to the bakery Owen was very excited. He was so excited about the brownie that he told us all about it. And when we weren't listening to him right away he told us about it even louder. And then, when he saw a cookie that looked good, he told everyone about it so loudly that the woman at the cash register was leaning backwards and workers in the back were poking their heads out to see what was the matter. And we took forever to decide which loaf of bread we were going to get, and with all those cookies there, guess what? We didn't even get a cookie. A croissant isn't is as good, and Owen didn't get to eat it right away, even though he kept on reminding everyone that we SHOULD eat it. And there was bottled water there and it didn't have a price tag on it, so it MIGHT have been free, but we didn't even check to see if it was free.
Then Owen had to stop throwing handfuls of gravel into the canal, even though James was doing it first. And Owen hardly ever gets to be the leader, and we told him to knock it off when he kept on running in front of James. And James was standing where Owen wanted to stand, but we yelled at Owen when he shoved James out of the way. And was Owen allowed to make a soup in the swamp by the wetland walk? Nope.
Owen wanted to read the letters of the graffiti on the boardwalk, but we told him not to read those words. Then he was really tired and wanted to be carried, but we wouldn't carry him, even though we definitely would have carried Felix if he was that tired.
We got a drink at the library and Owen didn't get to press the button in the elevator. And then when Owen found so many great books that he couldn't carry them all, we told him to only get as many books as he could carry. It's hard to carry that many books! And there are so many good ones! Then we went in another store and there were SO MANY COOL THINGS that Owen wanted to show them to everyone, but all we would ever say was "Stop touching that, Owen." And then everyone laughed at him because he pointed at a dog biscuit and said that he wanted to eat it.
Then Owen finally got to eat the croissant, and he needed a wipe off from a baby wipe, but he had to just sit there feeling sticky because everyone else eats too slow. And he was still hungry, but we had to go to Wegmans to get milk for Felix, and Owen really wanted to be in the steering wheel cart with Felix until he remembered how much fun it is to walk in Wegmans and NOT be in the cart...but then we wouldn't let him out of the cart!
And then Owen remembered about how there are free cookies at Wegmans, but we were SO mean to him and said "no cookies," and Owen told Mommy he didn't want her to be in our family anymore, and that made everyone feel terrible. And when we got back home Daddy made Owen carry in a stack of library books but there were two grown-up books in Owen's stack and grown-up book are way bigger than kids books, and Owen dropped them on the ground and ran inside.
And then Owen's lunch didn't taste good, and Daddy said that he couldn't have ice cream unless he finished his lunch and we NEVER get ice cream except of feast days and everyone else had some but Owen didn't get any.
II.
I sat there, eating my ice cream, hardly tasting it. What was Owen actually guilty of, that he was missing out on the ice cream for? When J came out with dishes for everyone except for him he tore away from the table yelling about how this was the "worst day in the woyld" and then hid behind the sofa, appearing only once to make a finger gun and shoot it at us.
Yes, he was out of control now. No, we couldn't give him ice cream. But geez, were we on his case all morning for anything other than being four? Of course he was acting four. He was getting into all of the trouble that James has outgrown and that Felix isn't big enough to try yet. And of course he was loud. He's Owen. Getting on his case for being noisier than the rest of his soft-spoken and mild-mannered family is just punishing him for his personality.
Even the row over finishing his lunch wasn't fair. He was eating a piece of disgusting leftover pizza--no one else wanted it. And why was it disgusting? Because James got to got to a special book lunch without Owen and made a pizza with chicken, bleu cheese, and pineapple. Owen was getting punished for being forced to eat his brother's leftovers that everyone else had turned their noses up at.
I rubbed my forehead and went looking for him. He was hiding behind the couch.
"Owen? Owen, come out. I want to talk to you."
"I wish I had got to eat some ice cream."
"I know. Hey, listen. Do you think maybe you didn't do such a great job making choices today?"
"I kind of want us to have ice cream again tomorrow."
"Yeah, maybe. Are you going to try to make some better choices?"
"Yeah." The stony look in his eyes started to come down, and I wondered if he was welling up.
"I don't think I was very patient this morning with everything that happened. Can I try to do a better job being your Dad tomorrow, and you can try to do a better job--"
"I'm sorry, Daddy." (He was crying now) "I got so mad at you 'cause you made me carry the grown up books and I threw them on the ground on purpose."
I let him cry on my shoulder for a minute and J came over, kneeling down and ready for Owen to apologize to her.
He brightened right up.
"I forgive you, Mommy."
III.
The boys on watching Raiders of the Lost Ark
James: "Actually, Owen, the Romans had the Lost Ark last. They carried it back for the Roman Empire after they sacked Jerusalem. So I think maybe some barbarians ended up with it after they stole it from Rome."
Owen: "Daddy, I wish the bad guys didn't have guns in Indiana Jones."
"You're right, it would be a lot less scary if--"
"No, I wish the good guys didn't have guns either."
"Well, it would be best if they didn't fight at--"
"I wish they all had LIGHTSABERS."
IV.
Owen: "It's so nice and peaceful up on the roof. I can see our neighbor's pool. I think we should go swimming in it."
I.
Owen had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. It started before we even left. We went to wash his hands in the bathroom and slipped on the stool. He got so mad that he screamed and started hitting the bathroom door.
Then he didn't want to hold hands crossing the street or walking in the parking lot, because James didn't have to hold hands. We wouldn't let him pester the man who was fishing by the canal either, and we wouldn't even let him try to fish or to give the man fishing advice when he found out that he hadn't caught any fish yet.
We didn't let him dance or run by the edge of the canal, either. He didn't even fall in. He was just close. But he didn't go in. We wouldn't let him on any of the boats that were tied up by the canal, even though no one was in them. Then we kept on pointing out interesting things for him to look at, but yelled at him when he was in the way of bicyclists and runners and not listening to us because he was looking at interesting things.
Also, Owen was very thirsty. And tired of walking. And Felix got to ride in the stroller because he was a baby, but Owen had to keep walking. And he couldn't share Mommy's water bottle because he had been sick recently, and that wasn't fair either.
And he didn't even step in dog poop. He just almost stepped in dog poop. But he didn't actually step in it.
When we got to the bakery Owen was very excited. He was so excited about the brownie that he told us all about it. And when we weren't listening to him right away he told us about it even louder. And then, when he saw a cookie that looked good, he told everyone about it so loudly that the woman at the cash register was leaning backwards and workers in the back were poking their heads out to see what was the matter. And we took forever to decide which loaf of bread we were going to get, and with all those cookies there, guess what? We didn't even get a cookie. A croissant isn't is as good, and Owen didn't get to eat it right away, even though he kept on reminding everyone that we SHOULD eat it. And there was bottled water there and it didn't have a price tag on it, so it MIGHT have been free, but we didn't even check to see if it was free.
Then Owen had to stop throwing handfuls of gravel into the canal, even though James was doing it first. And Owen hardly ever gets to be the leader, and we told him to knock it off when he kept on running in front of James. And James was standing where Owen wanted to stand, but we yelled at Owen when he shoved James out of the way. And was Owen allowed to make a soup in the swamp by the wetland walk? Nope.
Owen wanted to read the letters of the graffiti on the boardwalk, but we told him not to read those words. Then he was really tired and wanted to be carried, but we wouldn't carry him, even though we definitely would have carried Felix if he was that tired.
We got a drink at the library and Owen didn't get to press the button in the elevator. And then when Owen found so many great books that he couldn't carry them all, we told him to only get as many books as he could carry. It's hard to carry that many books! And there are so many good ones! Then we went in another store and there were SO MANY COOL THINGS that Owen wanted to show them to everyone, but all we would ever say was "Stop touching that, Owen." And then everyone laughed at him because he pointed at a dog biscuit and said that he wanted to eat it.
Then Owen finally got to eat the croissant, and he needed a wipe off from a baby wipe, but he had to just sit there feeling sticky because everyone else eats too slow. And he was still hungry, but we had to go to Wegmans to get milk for Felix, and Owen really wanted to be in the steering wheel cart with Felix until he remembered how much fun it is to walk in Wegmans and NOT be in the cart...but then we wouldn't let him out of the cart!
And then Owen remembered about how there are free cookies at Wegmans, but we were SO mean to him and said "no cookies," and Owen told Mommy he didn't want her to be in our family anymore, and that made everyone feel terrible. And when we got back home Daddy made Owen carry in a stack of library books but there were two grown-up books in Owen's stack and grown-up book are way bigger than kids books, and Owen dropped them on the ground and ran inside.
And then Owen's lunch didn't taste good, and Daddy said that he couldn't have ice cream unless he finished his lunch and we NEVER get ice cream except of feast days and everyone else had some but Owen didn't get any.
II.
I sat there, eating my ice cream, hardly tasting it. What was Owen actually guilty of, that he was missing out on the ice cream for? When J came out with dishes for everyone except for him he tore away from the table yelling about how this was the "worst day in the woyld" and then hid behind the sofa, appearing only once to make a finger gun and shoot it at us.
Yes, he was out of control now. No, we couldn't give him ice cream. But geez, were we on his case all morning for anything other than being four? Of course he was acting four. He was getting into all of the trouble that James has outgrown and that Felix isn't big enough to try yet. And of course he was loud. He's Owen. Getting on his case for being noisier than the rest of his soft-spoken and mild-mannered family is just punishing him for his personality.
Even the row over finishing his lunch wasn't fair. He was eating a piece of disgusting leftover pizza--no one else wanted it. And why was it disgusting? Because James got to got to a special book lunch without Owen and made a pizza with chicken, bleu cheese, and pineapple. Owen was getting punished for being forced to eat his brother's leftovers that everyone else had turned their noses up at.
I rubbed my forehead and went looking for him. He was hiding behind the couch.
"Owen? Owen, come out. I want to talk to you."
"I wish I had got to eat some ice cream."
"I know. Hey, listen. Do you think maybe you didn't do such a great job making choices today?"
"I kind of want us to have ice cream again tomorrow."
"Yeah, maybe. Are you going to try to make some better choices?"
"Yeah." The stony look in his eyes started to come down, and I wondered if he was welling up.
"I don't think I was very patient this morning with everything that happened. Can I try to do a better job being your Dad tomorrow, and you can try to do a better job--"
"I'm sorry, Daddy." (He was crying now) "I got so mad at you 'cause you made me carry the grown up books and I threw them on the ground on purpose."
I let him cry on my shoulder for a minute and J came over, kneeling down and ready for Owen to apologize to her.
He brightened right up.
"I forgive you, Mommy."
III.
The boys on watching Raiders of the Lost Ark
James: "Actually, Owen, the Romans had the Lost Ark last. They carried it back for the Roman Empire after they sacked Jerusalem. So I think maybe some barbarians ended up with it after they stole it from Rome."
Owen: "Daddy, I wish the bad guys didn't have guns in Indiana Jones."
"You're right, it would be a lot less scary if--"
"No, I wish the good guys didn't have guns either."
"Well, it would be best if they didn't fight at--"
"I wish they all had LIGHTSABERS."
IV.
Owen: "It's so nice and peaceful up on the roof. I can see our neighbor's pool. I think we should go swimming in it."
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